Just back from TITP, during the 5 days I smoked a carton of fags, which wasn't a lot given that I could smoke pretty much anywhere I wanted :D It was a great blow out, cider, fags, friends and some amazing music!!
So here I am, starting back at work tomorrow. So I have hoovered and febreezed the car (to discourage me) and have a small number of fags for today. Reminding myself of the reasons I wanna stop is important, money being one of the top ones at the min (£3.09 for 10 - I used to split a pack with my friends in high school - we'd chip in 75p each for 5!!).
But also there is a certain sense of personality shift for me. I am beginning a beautiful new career, am single and doing things I would never normally do (TITP is a huge example!). I am losing weight and taking control of my life through a forced positive mental attitude! I want to be a new, better me. And I believe that I can be that person, and that person doesn't need to rely on cigarettes for courage or stress relief or confidence. I know I have been down this road before, you guys have read the blogs, but I really do feel different this time - I feel ready, I want to be free.
So my preperation has been a combo of mental and physical tasks - I have pulled out some books I have been meaning to read, signed up for a million shifts at work, got my patches, cleaned the car and finally doing my blog. The return of Mr Nasty, of crazy Sarah (who becomes addicted to cream buns) and of the highs/lows and downright uglys of giving up an addiction are all coming up!
I hope you'll stick with me again!
No comments:
Post a Comment