So day 1 is over and I wake up on day 2 with a sense of relief. Don't get me wrong I know that there are going to be many battles to come, but in a small way I feel a sense of victory having overcome the dreaded day 1. You see once you are a few days down the line its harder to justify a sneaky cigarette. Day 1 you argue "uch it's only the first day, no big deal if I have one or two, I'm only just quitting...." Once you at day 5,6,7 then its harder to convince yourself that it is OK.
Convince yourself? Hmmm....I was deliberating this thought when I realized that I needed a new way of thinking about this battle. An idea I kinda stole from Alan Carrs' Easy Way to Stop Smoking; a fantastic book which I am reading in conjunction with the patches. I have never been a believer in positive reinforcement or tricking the brain into thinking something different.... until I seen my boyfriend performing some of the most outrageous moves whilst under the control of a hypnotist at Santa Ponsa. Very Very funny! I gave the book a real chance and it did have a lasting change in the way I thought about smoking just never really made me stop.
Anyway Mr Carr talks about his addiction in terms of a cigarette monster. A little monster which lives in your brain and is the reason why you are craving cigarettes. When you stop smoking this little monster starves and in turn makes you feel bad so that you want to smoke.
So I have decided to embrace this way of thinking and I think that it is going well. I have named my little monster Mr Nasty and even drawn you a picture of how I think he would look like.
My artistic skills may not be up to much but as you get the basic picture! Now instead of having arguments with myself in my head I argue with Mr Nasty and I am finding that it much easier to say no to him than to myself.
Mr Nasty lives in my tummy (now before you all start I know cigarette cravings are in the brain but the idea of something living in a space where there is barely room for one was a little far fetched don't ya think!?). So Mr Nasty lives in my tummy and he is made up of all that black, thick, disgusting gunk that accumulates in your lungs when you smoke. You know the stuff in the jar they show you at school which everyone goes "EUGH!" at then skip outside for their 'playtime' cigarette. Its a mixture of tar and phlegm and poison that are in cigarettes... and Mr Nasty stinks too! He smells like a thousand ashtrays all mixed in with years of stale smoke and sewage. His breathe smells like he's smoked 8 years of cigarettes at once and he never has any money ever! His skin is dull and he has no hair... he is revolting! He is my cigarette monster...He is the one who says "just have one" "no one will know" "you don't really want to give up anyway do you?". Now instead of my voice saying those things I hear a thick, gravelly voice which is harsh and breathless.
Its hard to say no to yourself. Saying no to Mr Nasty is particularly easy. I think about him and I feel sick and I know that the only way to get Mr Nasty out of my tummy for good is to stay off of the cigarettes! Keeping this thought in my head... Day 2 seems to fly by!
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